How Do I Erase This Stuff??

Some of it makes me sound so desperate and pathetic I think. I kind of like "Invincible" but aside from that really I'm not sure what I was thinking, putting my vulnerability on display like that. "No, no don't look please!", I begged him wishing he would just remember my damn birthday or at least stop teasing me about forgetting it,"Please - it's private!" I was begging him now and all he said was,"Babe, it's the internet!!" Okay, I'll give him that. Suck it up. Walk it off, my dad would say.
Even the political stuff you know?? I've done a lot of soul searching with my politics and a lot of people I know might give me shit about it but I give up on politics. I give up. I didn't even vote and I only felt guilty the day before for a milli-second. I've lobbied and volunteered and written letters and blah blah blah, the more I see the inside of it from the outside the more I think it's all bullshit. I KNOW it's bullshit, actually, essentially it's a popularity contest, They're all looking for the votes and they'll do what they'll do to get them. Like a pack of starving rats that are starting to eat each other. It's sick especially because my, my sisters', mothers', friends' rights are used like pawns in the get the vote game of politicians, McCain is coming to mind, back and forth like he gives a shit whether or not I have the right to a safe legal abortion if I need one again. He doesn't unless it's the popular thing to do. Not singling anyone out, we're talking the majority of them here, women as well. Hey Condi what happened to your pro choice stance?? Bush got your tongue??
These politicians humor us and I can say with absolute certainty that the sixty year old white guy doesn't give a shit whether or not we have rights to our own bodies. It won't ever be his problem, not now, maybe only if it's costing him votes in his district. Then, voila, it's our problem again.Disgraceful, and I REFUSE to put my rights any longer into the same hands of the people taking them away at their amusement and my expense. I refuse.
Oh, and PP, FPA, NOW, even, what's in the works for when we lose our most basic rights to our bodies?? We gonna sit around some more and bitch? Write some letters, throw some rallies??Wait til it's popular again??I'm not trying to dis ANY of the work that these oraganizations and the women that have participated in them have done - it was essential and successful to getting us where we are today and I'm incredibly thankful for that. I would like to say however that every time I attend some conference or volunteer meeting, or even just have a conversation sometimes, all I can think is, "This isn't working anymore", I wonder if they realize that it looks more and more like they're accidentally becoming part of the same machine they're trying to fight.
Anyway, bottom line, I wish that there was a way to erase these past blogs but alas, once again I'm learning that you cannot ever erase the past. No big deal, I guess, and I suppose it's important to remember where I was coming from and why I'm not going back there.